jen groeber: mama art

4 kids in 3 years: reflections on motherhood, art and life.

Category Archives: Memory

The Playground Disappeared

The playground suddenly disappeared. This both is and is not a metaphor. We were heading to the library, the place I would take the kids for story hours and sing … Continue reading

July 5, 2017 · 2 Comments

Love is the Tarragon

Tarragon. I had never used tarragon before working in a quaint New England sandwich and bake shop in 1994. I didn’t even know what cilantro tasted like or looked like, … Continue reading

June 20, 2017 · 16 Comments

The Art of the Lost Hour

We all grow older, grow up, get stinky, lose track of time. We remember, and then we hold tight suddenly, lamenting. There’s nothing to be done about it at all but this, this one hour outside of time, to celebrate, to mourn, to repurpose into something new that we can hang on a wall to remind us of what was.

May 10, 2017 · 6 Comments

The Christmas Card

I have always been buried by the weight of parts of things. It’s the finding the cord to hook up the printer and updating the software to work with the … Continue reading

December 25, 2016 · 4 Comments

On Grief and Farm Stands

I was picking up our share at the local farm today. It’s been a long week with a boil water ban due to a water main break. It was strange … Continue reading

September 30, 2016 · 20 Comments

Labor Day Weekend, Where Did it Go?

  Today was the last day of summer, Labor Day weekend, two days away from the start of school. In the morning I headed out alone to the beach with … Continue reading

September 6, 2016 · 6 Comments

The In-Between

I stepped outside today and it was what we call nether weather. It was neither cool nor warm, windy or calm. It felt like there was no temperature, no sun, the … Continue reading

August 21, 2016 · 4 Comments

The Weightlessness of Water

I could sit underwater and watch my children swim for hours. Well, not hours. I’m no David Blaine. I can only hold my breath for about four times as long … Continue reading

August 5, 2016 · 9 Comments

Turning Six, Not To Be Missed

My baby is turning six. I know I always say this. My baby is turning four. My baby is turning five. But this time I mean it. My baby is … Continue reading

June 17, 2016 · 15 Comments

We Went to the Ocean

We went to the ocean this weekend. I was resistant. “But we’ll miss three lacrosse games and two birthday parties and a lacrosse practice and an invitation to go to … Continue reading

April 20, 2016 · 20 Comments

My Baby’s First Date

My daughter went on her first date last weekend. They went to the movies. He wore a jacket and a dress shirt. She wore a San Francisco t-shirt from Old … Continue reading

April 12, 2016 · 10 Comments

Let My Love Open the Door

I pulled up in the drop off-line today, and threw the backpacks out the driver’s side window to the waiting teacher. I’ve been working up to this moment for days. … Continue reading

March 31, 2016 · 9 Comments

Happy Jazz Handsy Valentine’s Day

My kids were talking about Valentine’s Day in the back row of the minivan. My five-year-old was beyond excited about the day. They had all been told to wear red, … Continue reading

February 16, 2016 · 14 Comments

What I Remember, There You Are

It begins like this. My alarm goes off and I get out of bed. My husband is already awake, because he is an early bird.  I get out of bed, … Continue reading

January 26, 2016 · 30 Comments

Farewell Minivan: Ch-ch-ch-changes

My first car was a dusty yellow 69 VW Bug, but it should’ve been a brilliant yellow 73 Super Beetle we’d named Herbie. That’s the car my parents bought for … Continue reading

January 13, 2016 · 16 Comments

New Year’s Eve and a Child’s Soft Foot

New Year’s Eve is supposed to be a time for big picture things, for the meta, the thoughts about the resolutions about thinking, if you follow me. Except I woke … Continue reading

December 31, 2015 · 23 Comments

Elf on the Shelf Gets the Last Word

Something you might not know about me is that I’m not so into magical creatures. I mean, the Tooth Fairy forgot my kid last year (what a jerk, right?) and … Continue reading

December 27, 2015 · 7 Comments

The Big, Stupid Stuffed Panda

My seven-year-old daughter wants a stupid, stuffed panda for Christmas. Not just a stupid, stuffed panda, but a big, stupid stuffed panda, big enough to be bigger than her, for … Continue reading

December 17, 2015 · 19 Comments

A Dream About the Ocean

I had a dream about my brother, Butchie, on Friday night. We’d driven to the beach in my minivan. It was a place we’d never been before, the sort of … Continue reading

November 17, 2015 · 16 Comments

Swooping Like Birds

Sunday morning started slowly. We were in recovery. Recovery from the first full week of school and a Saturday where the kids played four different soccer games on four different fields … Continue reading

September 23, 2015 · 10 Comments

The Last Last Time

I was wringing out wet bathing suits and hanging them over the deck railing. Our front porch is about fifteen feet from the road with a lively view of the … Continue reading

September 8, 2015 · 12 Comments

The Summer of Enough

Last week my email account resent a bunch of emails with photo attachments, emails I’d sent a year ago. And my sister replied to a very back-to-school looking picture as … Continue reading

September 2, 2015 · 21 Comments

August is the Cruelest Month

This morning, as my husband walked out the front door, he reminded me that the painters were coming tomorrow and that we needed to vacate the house. They would come … Continue reading

August 30, 2015 · 15 Comments

Recreating My Childhood, One Board Game At a Time

I’ve been recreating my childhood one board game at a time. Or actually, not my whole entire childhood. Were I to try to recreate my whole entire childhood I’d need … Continue reading

August 17, 2015 · 26 Comments

Father’s Day and the White Undershirt

I woke yesterday morning to the mystical, warm smell of my husband ‘s white undershirt. I was half-asleep and he was half-asleep, and I curled up against him, my head … Continue reading

June 22, 2015 · 14 Comments

Two-Wheelers, Piano Recitals and Lost Teeth

I went for a run today. Just a week ago on my run there was still snow on the ground deep in the woods, tucked in the valleys, with a gray fog … Continue reading

April 30, 2015 · 13 Comments

Learning to Swim

I started swimming again, and it’s been a revelation. I grew up with a pool in the backyard. I have memories of swimming with my sisters at night while my … Continue reading

March 30, 2015 · 23 Comments

Melancholic Birthday Girl, Carry On

I’m a melancholic birthday girl, and it shows. I think my kids picked up on the impending doom of my birthday and my sad-sack state, because they were straight up punks for the week … Continue reading

February 28, 2015 · 24 Comments

A Dream About Love

I had a dream about my brother Butchie last night. He was wearing footy pajamas, the kind that zip up the front, all fleecy and precious. The kind my children … Continue reading

February 17, 2015 · 14 Comments

Going Home for the Funeral: The Reprise or The Rising

The smell of my uncle’s house. That was what first struck me. It smelled exactly the same as it had the last time I was there twenty-some years ago. Back … Continue reading

February 4, 2015 · 13 Comments

Going Home for the Funeral

I need to go home. There’s another funeral, and you always go to the funeral. In fact, funerals have become the only time I go home now, and it has … Continue reading

January 27, 2015 · 30 Comments

Reading (to My Children)

I love books. I love to read them. I dream about writing one someday. My shelves are covered, covered, covered with books. Because once one has acquired a book, whether … Continue reading

January 20, 2015 · 19 Comments

Taking Down the Tree

What is the soundtrack for taking down the Christmas tree? Is it my mother, almost into February, during stolen moments when we were all at school or a daycare center, … Continue reading

January 6, 2015 · 13 Comments

The Twins Turn Six (from the Basement Tapes)

Again and again this year I found myself beginning posts I never finished or finishing posts I never polished enough to post. So they’ve sat half-lost in a virtual notepad, … Continue reading

December 20, 2014 · 10 Comments

Sleeping Children, Peace, and Other Thankful Thoughts

Tim brought Mica to me last night. I was in bed. We were watching television, the president juxtaposed against Ferguson, burning cars and police in riot gear throwing tear gas, … Continue reading

November 26, 2014 · 8 Comments

Interview With My Mom, An Education

My Mom’s a talker. She can talk on and on and on. Which means I come by it honestly, anyway. And although I never expected it, I realize now that … Continue reading

November 21, 2014 · 27 Comments

The Nose, A Life in Smells

We have a smeller in the house. One would think I mean that we have someone who’s making the house smell bad, which isn’t that inaccurate. All four of my … Continue reading

October 8, 2014 · 20 Comments

One Year Blog-o-versary, 100 Years

It’s been a year in the blogosphere since I first began, and I had such high hopes. I wanted to write a one year post with that song 100 Years by … Continue reading

October 1, 2014 · 22 Comments

On Acrobats, Motherhood and Friendship

I am a circus performer. I am the tightrope walker, the fire breather (although usually only in the morning before brushing my teeth), the clown in the striped shirt doing jazz … Continue reading

September 18, 2014 · 29 Comments

Hand-Me-Downs, What We Choose to Keep

The day before school started I dug through the kids’ closet where I’ve been (haphazardly) stocking shoes and clothing to fit my children for the next ten years of their lives. … Continue reading

September 11, 2014 · 16 Comments

Found in the Fog

Last weekend was our last in Maine, or at least the last real day of summer for us. I awoke early, crept to the window and was despondent. There was nothing, … Continue reading

September 9, 2014 · 16 Comments

One Season Following Another…

The marsh grass along the path to the beach is just beginning to turn orange at the edges. It’s a subtle thing, like a gray hair at your temple, but … Continue reading

August 21, 2014 · 13 Comments

Ocean Stones and Memories

Summer is the time for visiting with family. The summer months are just brimming with relatives. And it’s so necessary, this grounding, these reminders of where you came from. But … Continue reading

August 7, 2014 · 19 Comments

The Things We Give Away (The Things We Save)

My sister just texted me asking if I wanted the “birth vases.” There’s one of mine and one of Butchie’s and the jury’s still out as to whether my other … Continue reading

July 9, 2014 · 22 Comments

In the Beginning There Was Jersey Girl

What was the first CD you bought? It was 1990 and I was torn between Bruce Springsteen and the E Street Band Box Set Live 1975-1985 and U2’s Joshua Tree (and … Continue reading

June 26, 2014 · 16 Comments

Who Doesn’t Love Dessert (Happy Birthday, Baby Girl)

Today on the beach I was having a moment with my newly 4 year-old daughter, Cabot. She was calling me Binky and saying, “I love you, Binky,”and then kissing me. Then I … Continue reading

June 22, 2014 · 24 Comments

My Father (This One May Contain S#!T)

[Jasper told me that the other day one of his kindergarten classmates told him that I haven’t posted lately. Which was true. And which means that somewhere in Massachusetts there’s … Continue reading

June 14, 2014 · 21 Comments

It’s the Little Things

All the big stuff is mostly done: the auction auctioned, the art show hung, the birthday party partied, even school is almost finished. This Sunday was a day of rest. … Continue reading

May 20, 2014 · 15 Comments

The Family Road Trip

There’s a radio station on the web called Pandora. And like it’s namesake, you type in your favorite artist and WHOOSH, that artist plus hundreds of similar artists fly out … Continue reading

May 6, 2014 · 12 Comments

Memento Mori, the Baby’s Dress

I’ve been busy. You know, busy with that other thing I do besides being a mom, wife, daughter, sister, friend, blogger (that still feels so weird to type), runner, and … Continue reading

April 20, 2014 · 15 Comments

Enter your email address to follow this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

Join 4,316 other followers

Follow jen groeber: mama art on WordPress.com